I  recall my Mother telling me “birds of a feather flock together”. She did not like certain friends, thinking they were bad for me. But, as an adult we can use this old phrase that in ways she was right. There is always free will. We make our own choices. Those we associate with have a huge impact on our perception of reality and our outlook on life. Think about the 10 people whom you consider to be the most important to who you are. Who are the people you call when things go wrong? Whom do you ask when you desire advice? Who do you complain to? Do you actually feel better after you complain to them, has their advice steered in you the right direction? Are these people all you aspire to be – do you want to be more like them or are they just who you feel comfortable with. Safe. If you could trade lives would you pick theirs? If the answer is no, why are you giving them power over you? Why are you letting them shape you? Are you asking for money advice from a broke person? Don’t. “You need to associate with people that inspire you, people that challenge you to rise higher, people that make you better. Don’t waste your valuable time with people that are not adding to your growth. Your destiny is too important.” Joel Osteen David Hawkins is attributed with the theory about levels of consciousness. There is a picture included. We all vibrate at a certain level of consciousness. Even Hitler had a level of consciousness as he was alive. From Hitler to Trump to Gandhi and Jesus we all vibrate at a certain level. The people who were around Hitler were not all bad people but they became bad because of their choices and influence. Birds of a feather. If they had spent time with Gandhi they would have risen to meet his vibration. But they chose poorly and history reflects it. People can lift us up or tear us down. Most people vibrate pretty low, greedy, selfish, angry, prideful humans. But we can all strive to be and do better. Joy being one of the highest vibrations is the hardest to achieve because it takes full acceptance of everyone and everything and unconditional love of everyone and every thing and total gratitude for all that is to be in this state. The ascended masters came here to map that way for us. It is possible to live a divine life in this life now. In this body. Under these circumstances. I want you to think about the people that you ask for advice. What is their go-to feeling or reaction on life? Fear? Anger? Pride? What about you -when someone gives you advice for the better will you listen or do you get angry and resent it? You want advice – feel it. Meditate see yourself making one choice how does it feel. See yourself making another choice how does that feel. The best feeling wins. If neutral then it means it’s not that big of a deal. Either one is fine just make a choice and go or find someone that embodies that perfect result for you. Ask them for advice. Want advice on money ask someone who has tons of it to spend and share. Want marriage advice? Ask someone who has been married for 30 years or more. Want career advice? Ask someone who in your book “made it”. Want parenting advice? Ask someone who has grown kids you admire. Want health advice? Ask someone who is healthy! I was dealing with anger – it just kept bottling up for me. So, I took a family constellation workshop with Natalie Berthold on anger. In the knowing field she set up a representative for us and our anger. Knowing that anger is just an emotion covering up lower vibrations like grief and pain, anger can be useful when righteous. The Anger was trying to help us saying “this too shall pass”. But often it is something that overpowers us and rages within us and we don’t even know why or where it is coming from. In the constellation we looked our anger in the eye and thanked it for protecting us and with God’s support behind us we forgave not only our anger but anger in our DNA passed down from past generations. The final meditation was one that works so well for me that I have to share it. Lay down and focus on your gut. Your solar plexus, known as the “I am center” and imagine all the bad feelings, thoughts, anger, sadness, and yucky feelings in your naval. And call on God (Divine Flow, Universe, Angels, High Self, or what works for you) to help you take these negative flows and transmute it to higher vibration. Imagine a bucket coming down and scooping out your yucky feelings and then imagine it going up up up to heaven (God, sky, etc). Where it is completely translated into highest vibrations your you and the universe. Yet another variation on my “Let it Go” theme. If we can let go of those low vibrations can we aim higher? I used to think that spirituality was a ladder that you climb. But really it is more of a light that you shine and share. It is something that lights you up and others see that in you and they light up to. Shining your own light inspires others to shine to, it gives them permission to shine. How do you shine? How do you see yourself? Strong, Happy. Sad. Broken. Fix it. It’s not just about how you see the world, how the world sees you matters too. Who do you want to be? I took a workshop for on camera acting years ago in NYC where we were looking for our commercial type and tag for agents. We did this exercise- to find my “type” and I think it works on many levels. We were looking for our niche, our “in”. So, Let’s revisit it now so we can focus on how the world sees us and diagnose how we want to be seen.

I asked friends (FRIENDS NOT JERKS) to send me adjectives of how they saw me. I realized the people saw me in ways I did not see myself: powerful, strong, intense, bold, organized (?!), leader, lovable, fun, vibrant, silly, smart, wise, nice, generous, happy, etc…I asked them who I reminded them of: Sally Field, Sara Silverman, Cherri O’Terri, Tracy Ullman, Oprah (?!), Kelly Clarkson, Jim Carrey to name a few…Nice. I liked that.

You do the same exercise. Do them all at once or break it up. Have fun/ Start/Right now. Email it, text it, facebook it, or live and in person or over the phone say “Hi Pal, I have a silly game I am doing- list some adjectives that describe me…And some famous people I remind you of…Is that a picture you like? If not, change it. Think of 10 people you want to be more like. Write down things that inspire you about them and 1 thing you can model your behavior on. If you are looking for a 12 week to at home course I highly suggest “The Artists Way” by Julia Cameron. There is an exercise like this in it, among many other wonderful journeys of self.

Instead of feeling jealousy list the attributes or items people have that you wish to claim as your own. These do not need to be people you know just people who inspire you.

Who has your dream body/health? What is it about it that you wish you had? What little step could you take to attain that for yourself?

Who in your opinion seems to always be happy/ full of joy and lead a bliss filled life? What is it about it that you wish you had? What little step could you take to attain that for yourself?

Who in your opinion seems to have a perfect relationship (*not a person but an actual bond/relationship)? What is it about that relationship that you wish you had?

Who has a life you wish you could embody? What is it about it that you wish you had? What little step could you take to attain that for yourself?

Who has the financial freedom you want to claim for yourself? What is it about it that you wish you had? What little step could you take to attain that for yourself?

Who’s intelligence/wisdom do you wish you could attain? What is it about it that you wish you had? What little step could you take to attain that for yourself?

Who has a career you wish you could mimic? What is it about it that you wish you had? What little step could you take to attain that for yourself?

Who’s spiritual/life coaching/advice do you request- what is it you feel they have that you don’t? What is it about them that you wish you had? What little step could you take to attain that for yourself?

Start visualizing yourself as the perfect version of you. FEEL it. Ask every day when you wake up for the Universe to help you raise your threshold for JOY. Imagine yourself surrounded by like minded people and feel how good it is to be supported and promoted in life. Try to not be specific about the how or who (in other words instead of seeing yourself in the perfect job at XYZ company or instead of visualizing yourself with your crush imagine the FEELING of being in the perfect career or the FEELING of being in love with the perfect partner) Visualization/Imagination is so powerful & FEELING is the secret ingredient as it is the frequency through which the universe works. If you are not a sit around and visualize it in your head kind of person- try making it visual. Write it down in a story AS IF it already happened in past tense and say THANK YOU for it or try doing a vision board feeling as if your creating it and feel your way through it Or, paint a picture that every time you look at it you know what it represents and FEEL it every time you look at it.

You can not control your world through others. YOU can however change yourself, the way you look at the world and the way you see yourself. YOU ARE MAGIC. You can create a better life by FEELING like it has already happened. Then (this is the hardest part*) TRUST you will match that frequency and rise to that vibration and, The world will change around you. Since I find trust to be the hardest part, insert Gratitude. Keep saying Thank you for what you want AS IF you already received it.